Flashbacks

The chapter I'm working on has two levels: one has the female character maintain a tough demeanor as she relates a heartbreaking event that occurred several years ago; the other level is select flashbacks of the event as she witnessed it.

The telling and the showing are intended to complement each other, not duplicate, so that between the two levels all will be clear to the reader, while the character who hears the story learns only the facts she's willing to share.

I originally showed the event in real time but when I slashed the first chapters it became part of the backstory. The event is important enough to need addressing at some point, so it became three small paragraphs of flashbacks.

Scene as originally written - 1849 words

Important parts written as flashbacks - 212 words

Ah, an economy of words, right?

Well, yes and no. The new chapter I wrote to frame those flashbacks came in at 1423 words

Net savings - 426 words. Maybe more in the next edit.

I'll keep chipping at it. Surely there's a beautiful statue in that chunk of stone.

--Cat